Trust and Love

I find the most difficult thing about life here is the lack of trust. Crime is so common that we have to always be on guard. I miss being able to take walk leisurely, making eye contact and saying “hello” to others walking by. Here, I pretty much have to avoid making eye contact. It’s not only in Flor del Campo, where I live, that I feel this way. In fact, even though Flor is known as one of the most dangerous areas of Tegucigalpa (you should see the shock on the faces of the university students, who are mostly wealthier Hondurans, when I tell them that I live in Flor…), I sometimes feels safer here because I’ve gotten to know some of the folks, and people here watch out for each other since they are well aware of the potential dangers.

Does trust and love go together? I believe a great deal in love: “And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love” (1 Corinthians 13:13, NIV). There are a lot of important things written in the Bible that Christians should try to follow, but I believe the most important is love. I believe it overrides everything else. Who are we to judge each other when we all falter? Why do we go around proclaiming that we are all sinners, but then isolate and attack certain groups of “sinners”. For instance, many Christians do not condone homosexuality. As a result, some choose to persecute homosexuals in various ways. But isn’t this an outright disregard for the love we are told to have for each other? “And this is his command: to believe in the name of his Son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us” (1 John 3:23, NIV).

So going back to the issue of trust and love… To quote 1 Corinthians 13 again (the famous “love chapter”), “[Love] always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres” (1 Corinthians 13:7, NIV). So does trust and love go together? If I love those around me, and if I trust that God is taking care of me, should I also trust those around me as well?

Let’s think of it this way: If someone mugs me while I am walking down the street, I can either 1) get mad and scared and start looking at everyone suspiciously, or 2) think that perhaps this person needed the money more than I do, and there was a reason (which I may not understand) this happened. Of course this doesn’t mean I should flaunt my money around – I can still be “street-smart”. But I shouldn’t stop trusting people, and I certainly shouldn’t stop loving people.

Some people have told me to be careful because North Americans are often taken advantage of here. I have been told that when people befriend North Americans, they often have ulterior motives. At first this made me suspicious of some of the people who wanted to get to know me better. When they started talking to me about how poor they are, how they wish someone could help them out, how they needed this or that, etc…, I thought “hmm… I think they are discreetly asking me to help them [financially].” I suppose this sort of hurt me because it felt like they were using me. But then I thought, “What if I were in their situation? Wouldn’t I wish someone would help me out?”

I’ve written here about trust and love from a religious perspective, but it doesn’t have to be about religion. I believe it can also be – and it also is – simply about being human. Who can honestly say that they don’t like to be trusted and loved? Just imagine what life would be like if we all treated each other in such a manner. I know I am an idealist and this is not the way the world is, and perhaps this is not the way the world will ever be, but I am happy if even one person chooses to trust and to love.

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A little disclaimer: I am not sure if I effectively articulated what I wanted to say. This whole thing about love is a very important part of who I am. But it can be difficult to articulate. I feel unsatisfied with what I’ve written. Perhaps I will re-visit this topic in a later entry…

I also am including 1 Corinthians 13 (NIV) in its entirety below. It’s worth reading, whether you are a Christian or not. I’ve read it dozens of times, but each time I find something new that really tugs at my heart. I’d like to share it with you!

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging symbol. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails. But where there are prophecies, they will cease; where there are tongues, they will be stilled; where there is knowledge, it will pass away. For we know in part and we prophecy in part, but when perfection comes, the imperfect disappears. When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought liked a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind me. Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.

And now these three remain: faith, hope, and love. But the greatest of these is love.”